ECing - it keeps going and going and going

The never ending elimination communication journey. With Leona and all the changes and instability in her life I believe this is a part of herself she knows she can control at least. For the past two months almost, this has meant control not going to the bathroom on the toilet or the potty. If I give her the option of going on the grass or rocks she’s all game some of the time at least (so people passing by the house may find it odd that I am holding her in the squat position, bare-bottomed, and her peeing on the grass by our front porch when it is obvious a fine, functioning toilet is in reachable distance).

Originally Judge and I were planning on just continuing to have her go diaper free during her non-sleeping (and non-travelling) hours, no matter how long she decided to go in her pants rather than on the toilet, and try not to get frustrated about her choice.

And a choice it is, I am certain, as she has been consistently pants-clean twice already – the first time for several weeks in January, which was ‘ruined’ by our trip to Taiwan, and then again the last few weeks before Eliana was born.

We’ve had tons of going-in-the-pants these past weeks, sometimes maybe four times a day even with me saying ‘Do you want to go pee on the toilet, potty or on the grass?’ rather than asking ‘Do you need to go pee?’ (often she will answer ‘no’ to the first question, so the options-giving doesn’t work as it ‘should’). Recently we had a day, though, where there were no pants that needed to be changed; however, all her trips to the lawn or the toilet were instigated by me.

Despite a day of ‘success’ we have changed our game-plan because I read a blog post and an article that was linked to in the post that made me re-think the whole situation. After discussing it with Judge I suggested we give her the choice of underwear or a diaper every time we change her diaper or she goes to the bathroom.

It totally took the stress out of the situation for me, and I think for Leona as well, because that day she went to the bathroom on the toilet the whole day, and the streak has continued (though not 100% all the time…and it has just been a couple days). So it is truly all about her havingcontrol and no pressure from us, as it should be.

Now, in terms of Eliana, we’ve started the journey as well – from day one actually (though in the beginning it was just giving her extra time between diaper changes and cuing her when there was some action), and I am continuing despite that article – not that I am dismissing it, but I need time to re-read it and re-think about it in terms of us and how we follow ECing, because I am pretty positive ECing can be done in a way that does not result in the issues outlined in the article (chronic constipation, small bladders, bedwetting, etc.) that are mentioned can occur when you potty train before the age of three.

[one of the places Leona was cool to pee at - the gravel parking lot by the dock behind the store where we stop by to throw rocks into the fjord almost every day]

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