getting into a rhythm

I think having dinner at Judge's grandma's house every day has been helping us settle into a rhythm, as dinner-time's like clock-work. That, and the fact that she'll be 5 months this coming Sunday and has just become immensely more stable than she used to be, and probably some other factors as well.

Until last Thursday, the only way we could get her to fall asleep was bounce her on the big exercise ball or walk her back and forth. I would try other methods, but she would scream so hard that I just couldn't take it ... and just laying with her and holding her, or just holding her in our arms and patting her, did nothing to help calm her down again - it was only by shoooshing and jiggling her that we were able to calm her down, then if we tried to lay her down once she was calm she'd be up in arms again instantly. So we figured, it's what she needs right now - whether we created the need or it was innate or a bit of both, it was what worked for her at the time.

After moving here though (to the in-laws' place), and her getting more on a 'schedule' where she'd sleep earlier - but then only for shorter stints, leaving me much more tired, last Thursday I just couldn't do the bounce. I was seriously too exhausted.

And I felt she was at a place where she's become sooooo much more stable, and understands things a bit more now, and I understand her a bit more (so I knew for certain she was not hungry, wet, hot, cold, etc), so I just laid with her. First I sang the lullaby I made up when she was in NICU and massaged her legs and feet for about 15 min, and she was wonderfully calm and sleepy. Then she cried. Then she screamed. Hard and loud. I held her in a firm embrace (so she couldn't thrash), I shhhhhh'ed, and lo-and-behold she calmed down after a few minutes (!!! first time ever been able to bring her back down from that level without a bounce), and with continued shhhhhhhhhh'ing she fell asleep, woke up, struggled against my continued firm hold a bit, fell asleep, etc, for about 30-40 min, and then was out! I did this for all of her naps, and for her night-first-time-to-sleep (usually at night when she wakes up she just eats and then falls asleep, it's wonderful and hasn't changed).

Every time the get-to-sleep routine is a bit different, adjusting as I find what is working and not working for that nap/sleep. A full week ball free. Hallelujah!

She still only sleeps one sleep-cycle naps during the day, but that's totally fine - just keeps me more on the tired-side is all.

Now, our evening goes like this:

Go to grandma's for dinner around 5:30-5:40. She gets some therapeutic 2nd and 3rd generation-up time while I eat and hang around a bit. 6:15 we head home, I feed her, give her a potty-tunity and her a bath, give her some naked time and another potty-tunity, put her jammies on, top her up with some feedage, and then down we go for go-to-sleep, which she'll usually have fallen into between 6:45 and 7:15. Out for the night until 7 or so, eating every 2 to 4 hours (the longer stretches earlier on, shorter ones in the morning).

Daytime she still is semi-irratic, though generally will be up for 1.5-3 hours, eating once or twice in each awake cycle, for 3-10 min each time; usually on the shorter end of both of those ranges.

This whole new non-bounce-to-sleep routine is a revelation-come-true. Mind-boggling. Empowering.

Oh, and she totally knows where her food is. Today she started crying, and Judge was holding her. I said just a minute, wanted to finish up with something (45 sec or so). I was close by and she leaned back craning her neck to see me, huge tearfilled eyes, wailing away. I walked out of the room for 2 sec and it *totally* escalated. 'Hungry', 'tired' and 'wait' are three words that really don't go together yet [do they ever?] ;)

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