It's decided. Next time we are having a baby in Norway. None of this 3-day paternity leave bull-crap. I need the full 14 weeks of husband-by-my-side provided in my motherland.
Originally Judge was going to have almost a full week's 'rest' with me and Leona here at his mom's place after our 3 days in the birthing center (kind of be an initial buffer if you will, as well as enjoy being a dad), as he took 4 days off work. Unfortunately those 4 days only got us out of the hospital/sit-a-month center and moved into his mom's place, and then the next day he had to head back to his 12-14 hour days. That leaves less than a little time for him to spend with Leona - and makes it really difficult to get rested when she cries at night, making his days even longer (of course he could go sleep somewhere else, but he - nor I - doesn't want that).
It is not that I am not being exceptionally well taken care of by his mom. Seriously, all you mothers out there will know how blessed I am when I say I have home-cooked meals delivered to my room, my - and Leona's - laundry washed daily, my bath-water drawn (because it has to be boiled first - I cannot just take a shower in regular water from the tap....she cranks up the water-boiler so the water that comes out of the tap is scalding, and then the water sits in the tub until it is bathable), and garbage removed a few times daily. All I have to do is rest, breast-feed, burp, change diapers.
But, I am lonely - and suffering from the baby blues. I know I could interact more with his mom, and I probably should, but if Leona's feeding/burping/diaper changing then I am more comfortable doing it myself, and if she is sleeping, well then she's sleeping and I try to rest or jump on the computer. I feel bad though (making my blues bluer) because his mom has now ended up just being a 'sit-a-month auntie' - or in worse terms a 'maid'. She is doing so much for me, and I really should be making a great effort to create time and opportunities for her to interact with her granddaughter, but I just don't have it in me as it stands.
Basically I really want Judge here with me. And that is why next time we are going to give birth in Norway. They know what's up and make it happen.
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Awww!!!! Everything is gonna be all right! Those first days often come with a lil blues! His momma has had children too so she probably understands how the first lil while is. Be patient with urself. And don't feel bad about judge not sleeping to good at night it's totally part of being a pappa n mamma! Say goodby to sleeping in or through the night for at least a couple years!! ;0) when u look back ull high five eachother and smile about the good ol days!! N gramma n lil Leona will bond and bring the family closer. Lovely bathtime is a great time is a great time for gramma to hold baby! It's always tricky to hold baby and wash hair! Don't worry the first lil while is so emotional And u will get so happy when blues ease up soon! Xoxox love uall!!!
ReplyDeleteOh gosh I know, the first month I was a mental wreck!! I wanted company so bad! Would you like a visit? I can bring Ali or leave him with my husband for a while. I was lonely too but had no energy to go out, and besides I was covered with a horrible postpartum rash that I didn't want anyone to see!
ReplyDelete-Amy/Senlia
Thanks yous!
ReplyDeleteCurrently though sometimes lonely I'm still at the 'visitors overwhelm me' stage, as Leona's rhythm of sleep-cry/fuss-feed-burp/fuss/wakefullness is difficult to get a hang of (thus it's impossible to schedule anything and to know when it's good for someone to stop by). Hopefully we'll get a hang of things soon :)
Yeah its definitely a haze the first month...or two. Hang in there, I'm thinking of you guys and hope all those conflicts are resolved. If you need anything, just post it!! And rest when you can! It'll make everything worlds brighter, mentally, emotionally, physically. I gave up doing anything like cleaning the first month, and just fed, diapered, cuddled baby, and slept.
ReplyDelete-Amy/Senlia